Renet and the Loose Ends
by Terraform
Summary: The 4kids show left so many unanswered questions, right? Here Donatello gets a chance to get some answers from the ditzy Timestress herself, Renet. (one-shot)


A/N: This is a one-shot attempting to fill in some of the plot holes on 4kids through Donatello's interrogation of Renet. It probably won't make sense unless you are familiar with the show and all its unanswered questions. It's an older (and revised) piece of work that I'm putting up for my amusement...and hopefully yours!

* * *

**Time: Present**

**Location: The Lair**

"So you're telling me that the _whole_ time we were stuck in the Cretaceous you knew we would have eventually made it back safely?"

Donatello looked over at Renet- a young interdimensional time mistress with the mental grasp of an entitled sixteen year old girl from the valley- and frowned. She returned a weak smile.

"Well, like, yeah...but I didn't think it was a big deal, though. We were totally just, like, having fun building a mud hut and making bone jewelry and stuff."

He took a step toward her, his face etched with a smile that seemed anything but friendly.

"Even with the threat of impending doom at the hands of an asteroid destined to collide into Earth, you didn't think it _might_ have been worth mentioning to us that we were 'like totally' going to get back to our time?"

"Well… I would have, but Lord Simultaneous is always going on about not disrupting the timeline and stuff, so I was, you know, just trying to be a good student or whatever."

Donatello pinched the bridge of his beak in a vain attempt to relieve the mounting pressure.

"Renet, I'm confused. You asked us to go back and help you with your test. Wouldn't you consider _that_ interference? Because I sure would have preferred to have been working at my computer some sixty-five million years in the future for that whole month we were stranded in the past."

A nervous giggle escaped her.

"Oh yeah, I totally didn't think of it that way…but you guys were totally awesome and totally saved my butt. There's no _way_ I would have passed that test without your help. Believe me, I checked. And to think I still might be dusting shelves as punishment would be like, so lame."

He stood frozen to the spot, unable to comprehend the blinding illogic of her thought process.

"Okay. At the moment all that is incidental. What I would really like to know is why you didn't come to our aid when we were stranded in the future?"

"...the future?"

"Yeah, as in what will happen tomorrow...the _future_."

"But that...that hasn't happened yet..."

"Okay, let me explain this again. We were here, in the present time, and a portal opened up and transported us one hundred years into the future to the year 2105. We were there a _whole year_ before we managed to get back. I admit it now- and I don't know why- but some part of me was hoping that you might have helped us out...you are a _time_ mistress, after all. I thought we had an _in_, to be frankly honest."

"Oh, that." she replied meekly.

"Yes, that. What happened to you? We could have really done with your help there."

Renet looked at the floor and mumbled something incoherent.

"What was that, Renet?"

"Okay, I admit it. I fully dropped the jamba on that one. It's just that, like, I don't know how to use the TV recorder and I _totally_ missed an episode of Gossip Girl. So I thought, well, what's the point of having all these rad time bending powers if I can't use them? All I have to do is gaze into the pool of happenchance and there they are, all the upcoming episodes I could ever want, right?...and before I knew it, one episode had turned into five, and five episodes into a hundred seasons...I mean, do you _realize_ how many spin-offs they had? It's only, like, my favorite show in the whole of dimensional time and space. So anyway, by the time I had finished watching them it was, like, so _so_ much later than I thought. Lord Simultaneous was, like, totally mad that I forgot to bring him his coffee. He's a real drag when you-"

"_Please_. Enough. It doesn't matter. We're back now, and I guess that's all that counts. If nothing else, just let me know how Cody and the future are going. Unfortunately we left in a rather rushed manner and there were a lot of loose ends that we were unable to tie up."

"_Ohmygod_, you guys are, like, _so_ linear. Here, watch this." Renet took her time staff and began spinning it around in her hands. "So, like, imagine this is time."

"Erm," he said hesitantly, "…okay."

"Now put your hand in it."

"What, in the twirling stick? Listen, I've trained enough on the bo staff in my time to know that all I'm going to do is end up with my hand getting whacked."

"Will you, like, trust me? Put your hand through."

Abandoning all sense of reason he drifted his hand towards the spinning staff. It was met unmercifully with a thump from the crown end of the time scepter.

"OUCH!" he quickly drew his hand back and cradled it to his chest. "Renet, what the shell?"

"That's what happens when you, like, fuck with the timeline, Donnie."

He looked at her incredulously.

"You could have just told me you weren't going to tell me what happens in the future."

"And miss the chance to show off my rhythmic gymnastics lessons? Like, _whatever_."

"I think I'm going to cry." He mumbled wryly.

"Look." Renet started. "Because you totally saved my hiney on several occasions, I owe you one. Now, I'm not going to, like, _tell_ you the future, but I'll just kind of talk you through it a bit."

"I'm listening."

She nodded, satisfied.

"So, I totally watched your reruns, and I kind of remember that Cody happened to have a back up of Serling on file, right?"

"…yeah." he said at length.

"And Cody had, like, all the money and brains to build whatever he wanted. Like maybe...?"

It suddenly struck him. "Another robot body for Serling!"

"Yeah, maybe. Maybe one, maybe a thousand…"

"So he's not alone." he said to himself.

"Not quite. Hm, who else would be interested in those yammering robo-dusters? To, like, protect the _pan galactic alliance_, maybe?"

"Bishop! No. Really? I still don't completely trust him ever since he scrambled my DNA."

"You, like, don't?"

"Should I?"

Renet gave an exaggerated shrug, "How should I know?"

He frowned, "I can't believe it. He really has changed."

"And maybe if you, like, had that kind of pull on the president's ear, maybe a few of your enemies would be under lock and key for good, right?"

"Darius." Donatello concluded. Renet looked innocently at the ceiling.

"Ahhhcho-_jammerhead_-ooo. Oh, bless me. AHH-_sh'okanaboisinaprisoncelloflight_-ooo. Like, there I go again. I should fully dig out the zyrtec."

"But the dark turtles, our maligned clones constructed by Sh'okanabo. What of them?"

"Now that I totally _cannot_ tell you. But only because you may have more to do with them than you think."

"Er…what?"

She rolled her eyes "Nice language skills Don, I thought you were, like, the _smart one_. Now don't trip me up on this, 'cause Lord Simultaneous will totally kill me if I let you know that you're going back to the future. Oops...crap. Don't worry, it's just, like, for a few weeks this time!"

Donatello felt himself turn greener.

"Like, give them a chance, Donnie. The dark turtles can be totally nice, I mean, they're still gross, but they can be super sweet too. And when Cody clones those clones they're like another version of – oh…dammit. Okay, I'm shutting up now. I've said too much."

"Oh." he said quietly. It was all beginning to be a bit too much to take in. "Just…just one more thing. Why didn't Augie and Robin turn up to April and Casey's wedding? _Why_?"

"I'm, like, a _timestress_, Donnie, not a children's television network executive. How should I know? Maybe they're just assholes."

Donatello cradled his head in his hands.

"Of course."

"Besides, you shouldn't take weddings so seriously. You're not out of the game yet."

He looked up at her confused. "What are you talking about?"

Renet grinned mischievously.

"You know what I'm talking about." Renet thumped the end of the time scepter on the ground, "Is this thing on? Let's go home."

"DESTINATION?" the robotic voice of the staff droned.

She rolled her eyes "D'uh…the seventy-ninth level of null time. Honestly, you'd, like, think it would know where home is by now. Lord Simultaneous should just have totally made ruby shoes or something. Anyway, later greenboy."

Donatello offered a half-hearted wave as the portal to the null time opened up and swallowed her into the cosmic ether.

"Bye, Renet. Don't rush back on my account."

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A/N: Come at me with your thoughts... I can take it!


End file.
